How to deal with people who try to get all the appreciation?

Well I'm not Leo, but I'd suggest you keep a diary of the next project you're working on together. (Don't let him know yet!) Make sure you record every bit of work you do for it. Make sure everything is dated, put in times it took to do things, anything you can add to support it. And record anything he actually pulls his finger out and does. Okay, it's a bit of extra work, but once the project is done you now have a full record of who actually did what work.

Then you have two options.

Sit down with him and go through the diary and point out how little he contributed. Tell him that you'll be keeping a diary of all subsequent projects and if he doesn't pull his weight on the next one (and from then on) then you'll show the project diary to the managers and explain the situation. With diary evidence like that, he and they would find it hard to dispute.

Or, if you've really had enough of it already and you don't think he'll change now, go straight to your line manager with the diary and ask them to get it sorted out.

I'm picturing a gladiatorial bout inside a massive stadium. Probably not much help to you, though.

Thanks for this wondeful advice, I'll try it for the next project.

It's a hard situation, but one that I, like you, have been often stuck in.

The question is, what is your relationship with this colleague?

If you have no plans of being friends with the guy, then I say do the diary thing, and take it up with the boss.

On the other hand, if this person is a friend, then private admonition along with public praise has worked for me: Bushido, the workplace, and handling others' mistakes

From the sound of it, it seems like he's not a friend, just a boob who needs his comeuppance.

Good luck.

OK. First up, there is nothing you can do about this guy. There is nothing you can do to change the way he rolls, 'cause that's just the way he is. Simple as that. What he does and says and how he acts and performs is completely out of your control. So, the best thing for you to do is give up believing that this guy will bend to your way of thinking. It ain't gonna happen.

So, what can you do??? Heaps. You can take a good, long, hard look at yourself, as that is the only person on planet Earth that you will have any hope of changing. And that is gonna take some hard work.

You see, this isn't about him, this is about you. This is about your reaction to him. This is about how you see him stealing your glory. This is about how all the others reckon he is a gun and your just the lazy guy. This is about you not being the guy on the podium getting all the well deserved praise. Sure, he seems to be stealing your spotlight, but it's your reaction that's eating you alive. It's your own competitive streak that's making your work life a misery. Not his.

You have some semblance of control over only one persons thoughts, emotions and reactions and that person is you, and you alone.

So, my advice is, from this point on you have to carefully watch your own emotions, your own temper and anger as it rises and falls throughout the day. Take note of when and where you get upset and learn to identify what situations seem to push your buttons the most. Over the course of time, you will quickly recognize how often and how intense certain situations fire you up. From this simple recognition you can then teach yourself to react in a different manner. A manner that is much less competitive. One that has much more compassion for the other guy. You can eventually learn to act in a much more enlightened way to the same situations that are destroying your joy at the moment.

Once you master these skills what will be different? He will still be there stealing your, and anyone else's glory for his own gain. The management team will still perhaps think he is a genius. But, none of this will bother you. As you will be aware of your own anger, or jealousy when it flairs up. You will be able to witness that anger and casually let it pass, therefore it will be having no control or bearing over your life what so ever. Which simply translates to the other guy having no control over your life.

Pretty simple, huh!

Are you open to chatting with him about his lack of input on projects? It doesn't have to be a heated discussion or anything, but, I'd talk to him about his not putting enough effort into your projects and then taking credit for it. I'd approach him about it and then maybe approach management.

If neither of these are an option, just make sure he's not walking all over you. it shouldn't really matter if he gets the credit as long as you're both having an equal stake in the work, y'know? But if it's mostly YOUR work, well, I'd be upset too...

I think dusty above is assuming that your partner KNOWS his behavior and how it's affecting you. Since you're letting him take the credit, he MIGHT even think you just don't like being in the spotlight and dealing with the attention... You never know.

The key here is setting him up for a fall, one that is well deserved. I assume that you are keeping him up to speed on the work that you are doing. Stop that. Just do the work as if he wasn't even there, and have him keep you up to speed on what he is doing.

Forget documenting work, as it isn't worth your time. No one is going to fix any problem for you. You have to fix it yourself.

It is clear that you are the leader and he is the sponge. I have had this happen many times before. When he comes by to get an update on the project work, just let him figure it out himself - don't explain anything to him. You are too busy doing things to let him interfere.

Next presentation, tell management what you have been doing, then turn to the sponge and ask him to tell what he has been doing. When he starts to tell about your work, interrupt and insist that he explains what he has been doing, not what you have been doing.

Try this: "Excuse me, that's not what we've been doing, that's what I've been doing. Tell us what you've been doing."

And, sadly, you need to go look for another place to work. He'll find another project and high achiever to sponge off of, and you'll find a much better opportunity to excel, with higher compensation commensurate with your higher performance.

The bottom line is:

1) you have taught him how to treat you, and he needs a different lesson.
2) management is blind to the obvious, and you need new management, and probably a new place to work.

You can't change him, you can't change management. All you can change is you and your place of employment.

Clair

I'm loving all the different angles people are giving to this situation.

From setting him up to take a fall, to 'recording' all yours and his actions, to tuning into your own emotions and looking from within.

I can't say I'd take any of that advice myself, not because its bad advice but...well the documenting doesn't really empower you... it just makes you look like somebody who cares too much about stuff that doesn't really matter. I'd only do that if you'd have fun doing it.

Talking with the guy won't work too well unless you change your approach. Otherwise he'll use the same communication skills and confidence to negate what you say.

Setting him up for a fall? That would mean what another person does and says owns you and controls you so much you have to stand on your head and go out of your way to find an awkward justice. (99.9999% doesn't care if the guy is faking and getting away with whatever he's getting away with. And besides...that will eventually catch up with him anyway.)

I'd agree he's not going to change. Dusty's reply I could have written myself, but after reading it...it made me shake my head because what he's describing is to really feel the emotions and be aware of them when he 'pushes your buttons'. This in itself just makes you feel crappier right? 'Teaching a new reaction' and simply feeling compassion doesn't really happen if you're lit up with annoyance.

I would agree though with the introspection part. Make a note if that type of personality/situation keeps reappearing in your life. That's a good sign it's your own inability to stand your ground for instance. I don't want to get all Wayne Dyer on you, but in this case you could be grateful for the guy. Because every time he shows up it gives you an opportunity to become a little more of yourself and find more freedom. And if you don't get round to that...well the situations will just keep popping up over and over again until you do (that's comforting isn't it). It's good to be just aware that you are running a pattern. In the past you responded to theses situations by being pissed off/annoyed and wanting to get 'justice'. The key is finding something else to do.

One approach would to make the whole thing amusing. If you do stick it to him, do so in front of him and/or the class/teachers. Problem with this is since you emphasized his communication skills, you might fall flat on your face...
unless wel,..the real thing you want to do is change your internal state. If you'd fill up with a sense of confidence, you'd simply say things like they as Clair Schwan describes it. I'm guessing though, this is not your forte, because if it would be, you wouldn't have felt annoyed in the first place. Nobody can steal your thunder if you're innately confident. But of course, there are ways of teaching yourself to change your internal states and feel confident. Neurolinguistic programming is all about this kind of stuff (look it up).

But you know, what dusty highlights, is the psychological/spiritual approach. And the real meat of it, the biggest thing you could get from this, apart from having fun wacking the guy over the head or having a rush of adrenaline while you stand up for what you feel is right - which might change your confidence forever, is something even more profound....

You know, nobody can steal your credit. That's like saying, I stole your self worth, now I have twice as much.

At some point it's going to hit you in the same way the following expression from my favorite author did

"You can't have love. You can't drop it behind the dressor along with your keys. You can't store it away. Nobody can steal it and runaway with twice as much. You don't have love, you are love."

Of course, the word "love" is interchangeable with 'credit', 'self worth', 'happiness' and so on.

that is a idea worth pondering about

ps.
Unless of course with credit you mean study credits and he's robbing you off your STC's. In that case take pictures of his genitals and bribe him with the threat of a massemail or wikipedia entry.

(sorry if this was not all that helpful)